Things Happen-The Makeup of a Godly Woman
Right away, you probably think of outward appearance or cosmetics, but let’s look deeper.
When you are a little girl and you fall and hurt yourself, your mom or gramma comes running and the first thing you hear is “ Awe Honey - are you okay? … I’m sorry” We tend to say we are sorry whether it was our fault or not. You could jump off the roof of your house and after you hit the ground your mom would come out and say “I’m sorry.” ??? Women identify with pain and we flinch when the children flinch and we get teary eyed when they are heart- broken and confused, especially in their teen years. Isn’t it ironic that as we grow older, and we hurt more ourselves and we become confused and have heartache, that the roles sometimes change?
Its tough getting old….getting old is not for wimps. I can only think of one thing worse than getting old and not being able to enjoy things as you once did accept for getting old all by yourself. No one to relate to, no one to share with, no one with which you have a history.
There is a process called time. Both character and cosmetics are involved with that time process. There are truckloads of change going on in our lives. A fun example would be - two senior citizens, talking to each other at a retirement center. One turns to the other and says: “Edward, I’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches and pains. I know you’re about my age, how do you feel?” Edward says, “I feel just like a new-born baby Mildred”
“Really!? Like a new born baby?”
“Yep, no hair, no teeth and I think I just wet my pants.” Silly?...not so much when you look at the reality of it, but at least they weren’t alone.
We dream our dreams and plan our goals, but change often manipulates those things, and when they do it will change us as well. Be ready.
When I held my little boys in my arms I never saw heartache or despair, ill health and struggles for them. I only saw my dreams concerning their happiness and health…their successes and greatness. Things happen.
Things Happen
Things happen. The COPE and Walking in Peace ministries are all about overcoming. Sometimes we get comfortable thinking if we could “just get through” our circumstances we would be okay. I don’t know about you but I don’t want to just get by…I want to be stronger, wiser and more resilient than anything bad that may come into my life.
A hurting family, for instance means that someone or something has caused pain to enter into the relationship. To be in the midst of a hurting family doesn’t mean that you or your spouse did anything wrong. It doesn’t mean that your children are a burden and it doesn’t mean that pain has to be forever or leave a scar forever.
Ex: I fell a lot when I was a kid….it hurt each time, but I don’t have one scar to prove my point. In fact I did have a scar on one finger of my left hand for more than 20 years. I can’t see it any more. It was caused by a razor. It healed. I didn’t do anything special, time took over and it healed. Unfortunately, time doesn’t heal everything or everyone. In those cases it takes something bigger, something you can trust every day through any issue. It takes faith in a big God and it takes something very useful… something you have to put to work. It takes trust.
The home starts out hopeful and when children are added it also can become overwhelming. Uh-huh, things happen.
What kind of things can cause a hopeful, expectant and happy family to fill with despair and sadness? Do any of these sound familiar? …and do any of these things change your ‘make up’ as a woman?
-Loss of job, unfaithful spouse, unfaithful self, ailing parents, wayward children, financial problems, unsaved family member (spouse, child, parents), unfaithful friends, the feeling of betrayal…maybe it’s something that at least on the surface seems simple….loss of feelings - love or worse…loss of respect for your partner. When one person in a relationship is hurting…every person involved in that relationship is hurting…everyone feels the pain of despair when there is hurt in the family.
Maybe it comes down to expectations and maturity?
Getting started: A man and woman tie the knot and commit themselves to the other for life, til’ death….. And then things happen. You may not have thought about it but the Bible is chock full of examples of what happens in life on a day to day basis. Let me ask...
Where in the Bible does it say anywhere that Adam and Eve were in love? Let me read to you what Adam said when the Lord brought his newly created helper, the first woman ever - to him.
Genesis 2:18 “And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone;” S0- God created the animals and Adam named them all…the cattle, the fowl…every beast of the field…..BUT there was no one quite like Adam…..
Well, The Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and while he slept, God took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh and with the rib; the Lord God made a woman, and brought her to the man Adam.
AND THEN… ADAM SAID - are you ready for this…..here comes the good part, here is where it gets real juicy, here comes the excitement, the romance and gratitude to God for this beautiful creature….
Uh-hum…..Adam said “This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of man” (there were no cat calls or whistles, no flirting, no whooping).
There was no romance, no expectation - just a matter of fact, practical statement and to a woman’s frame of mind kind of boring too. I could go into what Eve may have been thinking about that but I think it is safer not to since it would be all speculation and my point of view, which has been sometimes known to be a little warped.
Are you missing romance in your life…..? If yes, what does that do to your countenance and security? You may be putting a lot of stock on that one issue alone. Abraham lied about Sarah and said she was his sister to save his own skin….now there is a courageous soul……or what about kid problems…remember Cain and Abel - first family, first murder; …what about Jacob and his brother Esau who had trouble with deception and thievery.
There is struggle in relationships. Ask yourself if they are worth the struggle. God believes in them. I say a resounding YES! It is inevitable that you will struggle at one time or another. Your family, not being perfect will have its problems. It is what you do with those issues that count. It’s not IF you will have problems…it is WHEN. It is not WILL I get through this…it is HOW to overcome the hardships and disappointments.
Do you care to admit that you have trouble asking for help? I can admit it - I don’t ask for assistance very often. Why? Do we think we don’t deserve it? Were we led to believe that only wimps asked for help? Afraid of being rejected? What is the real reason? Maybe you are struggling for respect or attention and you think if you could only do it alone you would prove yourself to others. Besides you can do it better alone-how many don’t ask for help because you know if you take time out to show someone how to do it - you could already have it finished?!
I want to look at Moses for a minute. Remember the battle against Amalek? (Exodus 17:8-13) The battle would have been lost if it wasn’t for Aaron, Moses’ brother and Hur. Uh, well let me elaborate. That is they would have lost if they had not been obedient to the Lord. Listen…Moses told Joshua to take some men and fight against Amalek as he remained on the hill with his rod in his hand. As long as he could hold the rod up, they would win the battle……Moses could not do it under his own strength. His brother Aaron and Hur put a rock under Moses to sit on and then each of them held up a hand of Moses in order to win the battle. Win they did! Could it have been won without the Lord? After all, while Moses was holding up the Rod, and Aaron and Hur were on either side of him, who was doing the fighting. Who was in the danger of battle? Joshua - so who won the battle then? Again, could it have it been done without the Lord? ...we cannot do everything alone and we are not expected to.
The Lord proved his presence, love, guidance and He also ground in the foundation of truth and trust. He never leaves his own to handle things alone…and when you are in a relationship, especially marriage; you are not expected to live it alone. We mature through trials but believers are never without the company of God and His word...even when things happen.
The makeup of a woman changes as all things do with time and experience. You do have some say over what you become and how you appear.
We can count on God. Can our family (friends, co-workers, etc.) count on us? What does your presence bring to your family (friends, co-workers, etc)? What about your countenance - what does your outward expressions say about you. Your face can be read, your actions can be read and the words you don’t say can be slipped in quietly between the words you do say. You can be read like a book, especially by family members or co-workers - those who are around you several hours a day.
You set the precedent for the character of your family. How they respond and react to circumstance will depend on how you respond. Of course your spouse is responsible too. I know that because Gen. 2:24 says that when man and woman come together as man and wife, we become one flesh. So what you do is what he is doing and what he does is what you are doing? HUH? Well, look, your right hand maybe stealing from the cookie jar but your mind is aware, your other hand is present, your eyes are ever watching, etc.-you are guilty even though only one hand is stealing. When trouble comes, it is not due to a part of the whole and a part of the whole is not going to be able to rectify the wrong. If you poke me in the eye on purpose - I don’t accuse your finger of doing it and then tell you “don’t worry about it, I may be blind, but it is your finger’s fault not yours.
As in a marriage relationship, both parties are responsible for grieving as well as bringing joy to the union. The sooner we recognize our responsibility in matters the sooner things can turn around. Why - WHY would you want to handle things alone anyway? Help each other, CHOOSE to….and as a bonus, it teaches an excellent lesson to the children.
Women are often hard pressed to put on a happy face and appear to be okay when we are not. Striving to be Christ like in our daily walk can be very stressful IF we think we cannot err or appear imperfect. That is not what God expects of us.
The makeup of a Godly woman starts from the inside with truth and integrity.
The makeup of a Godly woman abounds in trust along with expectation that God will be obviously involved in her life.
It will show in her outward ‘make up’ if she has His peace. When other’s look at you, do they see Christ at all? Get up and go look in the mirror. Do you see superficiality or a godly woman in the making? The process is ongoing. Maybelline my cover our outward flaws but Jesus can take those flaws and turn them into something beautiful for Him. Where there are worry wrinkles, Jesus said ‘be anxious for nothing” …Philippians 4:6 Where there are words of discouragement, God will change to thoughts and words of enlightenment and confidence.
Our rosy cheeks may be turned over to Revlon but our rosy attitude will come from knowing that peace, joy and contentment come from God.
Yes, things change… and there is a right time for all things to change (Ecclesiastes 3:1 “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven” –continue to read to verse 11) …and when things change… things happen.
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