Walking in Peace

Life has a lot of twists, turns, ups and downs. This year I took a ride on the biggest coaster of all!  My son who had finally come home, served his jail time, and seemed to be turning his life around has Bi Polar Disorder. This is not a fun ride!

My son who was a fun loving person became someone I did not know. The anger, the language, throwing things. I had no idea what was wrong. All I knew was that I didn’t recognize my boy. It started slow and kept on growing. He started staying in the bedroom more, he seemed to withdraw from us. He started to get angry at the smallest thing. He would use the most horrible language and call me horrible names. He pushed me against walls, he shoved me, he locked me out of my own house, and would get this evil look in his eyes. I didn’t know what happened, all I know is that I wanted to get off my coaster and run as far as I could. It was scary, I had no idea when the next tantrum would come.

I had him go to my doctor, he was diagnosed as Bi Polar and was prescribed medication. Yes! My problems were over, he is going to be fixed! Boy was I wrong. You see a lot of people who have this disease think they are fine and stop taking the medication. My son decided he didn’t need the medication and he got even worse. While he was on his medication he married his girlfriend and my ride got even worse. His wife threw him out and told me he was mine! Finally after a couple months of helping him, hoping he would get better I had to use tough love and not let him stay in my home. This was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It was cold, it was storming and my son was now sleeping in the streets. My heart ached, I was sick to my stomach. Would this nightmare ever end?

Well it has been 2 weeks now since my son made the decision to go back to his wife, take his meds, and work hard to find a job. He is happy and talkative. He is coaching softball and has gotten a job. I use to get upset with people when they told me to use tough love, I thought it was cruel and that I wouldn’t be able to do it. I could not have done this without the help of my Father in Heaven. I remember crying in my car and yelling at God. I told Him that I can’t do this anymore, I didn’t have the strength. I gave it all to Him. Well, He gave me the strength to stand firm and because of this my son decided he needed to change. I praise God everyday for helping my son and I. We have been through a lot but God said in Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed; for the LORD thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest.”

I want to personally thank all those who have been praying for my son and I.  PRAYER WORKS! Be patient - God will answer.